The Babbling Bee

It's really interesting that only a week has gone by and I can already feel the muscles in my body getting stronger. Most of the soreness has wore off and only a few places are lingering with pain but I suspect that once I get into the swing of things that too will diminish. Doesn't seem right to me that there isn't stiffness in my limbs. Eh, time to up the anti? It just seems too early to me.

Anyway, today I had my consultation with a doctor regarding my nose reconstruction. Well, I suppose reconstruction is too heavy a word as it's more of a reduction. He went through the process of showing me what he'd do. He will have to break part of my nasal bone in order to reduce the length, but he said the operation shouldn't last more than 2 hours and what I'm getting is pretty standard. The changes aren't really that drastic, and at least the shape of my nose would still be generally the same. Obviously the length is another story. It still seems a little surreal that I even went to the appointment. I wasn't really sure what to expect and it felt so rushed and hurried to me despite there not really being a lot of people there.

This whole decision is leaving me really conflicted though. I do really want to have the surgery done since I've hated my nose for years and want something that's ideal in appearance. I just feel so damn alone and am not really getting much support for this at all. It shouldn't bother me but I can't help it. Why I allow myself to get wrapped up in such conflicting emotional states I'll never know. I did get an exact quote and set a date for the surgery while I was there. The woman in charge of doing the process was nice enough and we chatted for a little while as we set up the appointments. I'll have to go into the office again a week before the surgery for Pre-Op. Then on the 27th I'll be going in for the actual procedure. The grand total to all this will be around 6k. That's about where I thought it would be. I wanted to ensure that I had enough time off and made the date before the weekend of Memorial Day so I had at least a three day weekend to recover. After that I'm told that I'll need to wear a nose split for at least 6 days because of the nasal bone trimming. Bruising will be pretty bad for a while and so will the swelling. Probably won't be another month before that goes away.

Somehow this year feels like something is changing for me. I don't know what that might be, but there is just that feeling. Perhaps it's because for once I'm setting things in motion that should have been done ages ago. Who knows?